why you can’t hold onto money (pulling mastery forward series)
hey y’all! today we are diving into one of my favorite series of posts - examples of what it looks like to pull mastery forward. if you haven’t read it, i suggest starting with this post on pulling mastery forward so you understand the terminology and energetics.
in today’s deep dive we will be looking at a question i get all the time: why can’t i seem to hold onto money?
#bornawakes® are usually great manifesters, especially of objects, opportunities etc but we can be really blocked around money. this is for a whole host of reasons but usually has to do with our having spent our lives trying to work bottom-up the way everyone else does when we should be working top-down (see directionality). this leads to trying to elevate/“raise” the frequency of money, or feeling obligated to purify it, rather than simply bringing absolute energy into our money exchanges. when you’re holding contracts like this you often manifest puritanical dynamics with money as well as situations where you feel like money is dirty, corrupt, or brings toxic energy into your life. who would want money anyways, when it works like THAT?
the specific question i get is people who are able to sometimes manifest windfalls, especially in a pinch, but other times find themselves STRAPPED, totally broke, or creating random unexpected bills that take away any new money they have manifested. it can be really confusing to figure out what’s going on and can feel like you’re being punished or like you aren’t as good at manifesting as you thought you were.
the #bornawake® piece of the puzzle is outlined above, but there are still two more important layers to consider: the attachment/its origin, and your 3d operating system.
keep in mind the following is only one example and everyone’s attachments are unique. these posts are inspired by countless client sessions as well as my own personal process but they are not an exact representation of any one person or situation. to truly discover your own attachments and resolve them for good, you’ll need access to the portal (or whatever healing process you’ve found successful).
OK, SO: THE #BORNAWAKE® WHO CAN’T HOLD ONTO MONEY FOR THE LIFE OF THEM
this person is super frustrated. they don’t GET it. there doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to why they SOMETIMES make bank but other times go broke. and why can’t they ever seem to accumulate savings? combine this with the #bornawake® inclination to either focus on healing at the expense of making a living, or focus on work/creation, pushing themselves until they get sick at the expense of their energetic alignment - and it’s easy to start wondering if YOU are the problem. this #bornawake® is worried they will need to give up their priorities in order to make a living. they are worried they need to choose between being successful and being happy. society reaffirms this by making them feel defective and weird for wanting to sit in the sun all day and still, somehow, be rich.
this #bornawake® has gone through periods of making a decent living but they are usually followed by periods of NOTHING. whenever they get money in the bank, something happens to deplete their savings. they can never seem to reach a place of being able to rest or take it easy. it feels like they are still in survival mode. they try to practice abundance and to do work to change their subconscious beliefs about money, and a lot of times when they do these things they will get help from a friend, or a free item they’ve wanted or a crazy deal on rent. but the only way they can manifest MONEY is by sacrificing their happiness in some way.
an example attachment in this scenario would be a past life where the person experienced a heartbreaking financial setback, for example a bankruptcy or creating a business that ended up failing in a big, public way. the trauma of that past life is still being projected out through their field into this 3d incarnation, and so unbeknownst to them they have a deep fear of failure if they try at what they truly love. this is why when they dig in their subconscious it’s hard to find anything - it didn’t start in this life. the trauma of the past life also RECREATES losses/ruin every time they do start to succeed, because the attachment of their business failing//going broke has not been completed.
there are two ways this ‘plays out’ in 3d.
version 1: this person is currently working at a dead-end job that they can’t stand. they are trying to put together a savings. in the meantime they are investing in healing trainings because doing that kind of work on themselves is the only thing that keeps them halfway sane. but they are starting to feel like it doesn’t do anything anymore, and they wonder if they are sabotaging themselves. they feel stuck but also too disheartened to try and find a better job. they know something deeper is going on but they can’t figure out what.
version 2: this person is super successful in their career and manifest big paydays but they’re always followed by big expenses, or maybe they go on a spending spree and sabotage their own ability to accumulate wealth. they don’t feel comfortable around money, as much as they desire it and prioritize it. there is a hollow feeling underneath their successes and potentially some impostor syndrome. recurring fears of being fired, demoted, or losing all business in a flash. perfectionism.
while the fear of failure plays out in their 3d experience in one of the ways described above, it probably also manifests in many other areas of their life. as such that attachment may not be resolved by working on money alone but would be better served by addressing how fear of failure shows up. simultaneously, the initial emotions and trauma of having failed will need to be resolved (see the portal) so that the #bornawake® can uncover the learning that took place. once they have uncovered their mastery from that life they can go about pulling it forward (again, portal) by starting to look for what in their 3d self will prevent this mastery from being fully embodied.
this would be looking at how fear of failure is expressed in their life: where do they not try - or try too hard to avoid the pain of failing? as well as looking at where they’re guarding against loss: either by clutching tightly to things, or by sabotaging so they control when the loss happens? addressing survival mode that stemmed from losing everything, and how that was re-imprinted in this incarnation (where do they feel unsafe? unable to relax?) will be a key part of truly pulling this forward.
an example of this might be that this person was constantly rejected in their relationship with their mother, and as a result they feel unsafe around women. this would need to be resolved and released (see portal) in order for the mastery to pull forward. this mastery would probably have to do with resilience, self-confidence, believing that they could try again. in this incarnation, the path forward might involve being able to be supported by women and that once that locked into the field, this being would be able to regain self-confidence to start identifying and living in alignment with what THEY were truly excited about.
how’s that? hit me here with questions or requests for future topics :) and if you’re ready to dive deeper into this work go ahead and start your free 5-day trial of the portal. thanks for reading!
xx SPIRIT